"Do not make enemies who are not worthy of your every effort to render them into a state of complete ineffectiveness."
"Leadership Secrets of Attila The Hun" by Wess Roberts, Ph.D
I'm a big movie fan. Let me rephrase that - I LOVE going to the movies!
A few days ago I went to see "Ender's Game." I don't always do my research before seeing a movie. Often times just being wowed during a preview is enough to pique my interest. So, I was quite unaware of the author of the original book, Orson Scott Card. I actually had never heard of the man - not until I tagged myself at Seattle's Cinerama while also posting a picture of my ticket stub.
Imagine my surprise when several of my Facebook friends showed grave disapproval for my actions. (Usually they are very interested in my reviews of certain movies.)
The first post was a sad face emoticon to which I replied, "What?!" Then several other friends also voiced their disapproval. A few posts further another friend stated that Orson Scott Card was quite homophobic. I had briefly heard, through the electronic grapevine, something about homophobia and this movie, but I paid no mind to it - until now.
Decision Time
I could say that I spent time debating whether I, as a same-gender loving man, should have stayed or walked out in protest. I could say that I did the politically correct thing and walked out under the banner of some "social justice" mantra/creed. I could say that my conscious was pricked with the social injustice of paying money for a movie adapted from an author who has strong views against my very existence.
But I'd be lying.
I did no such thing. As I said, I LOVE going to the movies! And after the movie's conclusion, deemed the money and the time spent well worth it. But having gone through this slight Facebook experience has raised many a question as to where my loyalties might or might not lie.
For the record, my loyalties always lie first and foremost with my interests and myself. Some may call me selfish (in a derogatory and negative sense), but everything I do is first from the subject of I and me. I do not believe in "selfless acts." How could there be, when the action I take, and the only rational and logical reason for it, is first filtered through my own reasoning, experiences, filters, feelings, emotions, foresight, conscious and/or subconscious mind? All decisions are made completely full of my internal input and reasoning, my own self-reasoning. The impetus to act originates in me? I do it because I want to or I don't want to. Our culture has deemed these selfish ideologies treasonous towards mutual cooperation, support, or philanthropy. I disagree. For instance, if I volunteer to feed the hungry, house the homeless, help the poor, or assist the wounded and sick, it is because I want to. The actions often taken for the benefit of another is also an investment into your brighter future. Everything we do starts with a self-full desire. There is nothing wrong in this. How we use these desires determines its benefit or detriment.
Choose Your Battles Wisely!
Having said that, I would like to turn my attention to the drummers we march to and the consequences of jumping on bandwagons. When does self-autonomy and self-interest get trampled by group-think and tunnel-vision? I live at the crossroads of many movements. And I live in a city where I'm hard pressed to find a person who doesn't have some ideology, movement, agenda, petition, lobby, or cause they are actively supporting or participating in. I have watched as movements have come and gone and I've noticed that one of two things usually happens:
- The movement grows too large to be sustainable and ultimately fails.
- The movement succeeds in its intended purpose but no one really thought through what to do once they achieved their goal. (This one usually leaves the foot soldiers without tools, skills, or foresight to take full advantage of the rights and/or privileges they have been granted.)
Marching to My Own Drummer!
I am an American. We fought a tyrannous British crown and won our independence. A few centuries later and we have deemed ourselves the beacon of light and hope for the entire planet. However, I find it quite unhealthy to have a strict, unwavering, and unquestionable patriotism that does not question actions taken by our country that might be considered detrimental to the livelihood of others on this planet. I do not support this spirit of xenophobia that has crippled our politics and the formation of these debilitating "us" vs. "them" camps. It is not in my best interest to claim our country as ultimately supreme and numero uno, claim that we are invincible, and that all our actions are just. Nor is it in my best interest to assume that our government is trying to strip me of my rights and freedoms at every turn. Conspiracy and paranoia do not serve me.
I am a Christian is so far as I follow and esteem the teachings of Jesus of Nazareth as a path to enlightenment and spiritual mastery - literally to be one like Christ. However, be it far from me to any longer support the twisted actions and beliefs that contradict the basic teachings of Jesus. I will not march to the drummer of rapture-ready escapism that would doom this planet to the abyss while following the wayward belief that it doesn't matter since Jesus will shortly return to take me away. It is not in my best interest to help legislate Christian ideologies so that I am safe from the sinners of this country all the while turning a blind eye to those hurting who truly need the demonstration of God's love. Also, it is not in my self-interest to meld my spirituality with my national affiliation.
I am black! However, I will not and should not feel guilty for not supporting every cause, march, or movement that pertains to a particular black issue. I am keenly aware of those who came before who fought and died for the rights and privileges that I enjoy today. To them I am grateful. But to suggest that because I am black I should not speak against things that I find distasteful in our community is erroneous. There are many systemic elements that prevent many African Americans from achieving the success they so desire. There are also many things the African American community has done and continues to do to itself to keep itself crippled, fractured, and lame. These statements do not mean I have internalized racism. It means that I have a brain! It is not in my self-interest to stay silent about issues that we bring upon ourselves. It is not in my best interest to get mired down in the argument of Caucasian assimilation when I have the ability to choose for myself how I will exist in this world. And It is not in my best interest to clothe myself with stereotypes for the sake of keeping true to a larger and more pervasive African American cultural identity.
For the lack of a better political party in this country at this time, I am a registered Democrat. And it would be a lie for me to say that I follow and support all legislative, fiscal, or liberal policies that are presented. I reserve the right to say "no," "I don't know," or "perhaps there is a better way," and not be shunned or demonized. I think that is a great evil we have in this country - when we become so stuck in our corporate thinking (group-think) that any idea or contrary position is something to be demonized or completely disregarded without legitimate consideration, at least for a moment. There are things conservatives can teach liberals and vice versa. It takes two wings (right and left) to fly. It does not serve me to lock out all contrary opinions, thoughts, or beliefs without due consideration. It does not serve me to label myself liberal and follow only the rules, regulations, and ideologies of this one camp. It is not in my best interest to vehemently support a position only for the sake of keeping with party lines and party loyalties.
I am a homosexual! Now, this might mean a lot of things but for the sake of this article, I want to spend a little more time explaining what it doesn't mean in the context of political and social loyalties.
I will not blindly be a flag carrier!
Like the black section above, this and the following statements do not mean I have internalized homophobia. It means that I will not be suckered into the argument that just because I say and hold contrary opinions about the LGBTQI community means I should be demonized or discounted because I am somehow sick in the head and wrestling with some internal demons. See what this thinking devolves into - a community that is so blind to its own faults and those who voice them that they will forever repeat their mistakes until one day they either wake up or cripple themselves beyond repair. The prophets of our movement will be stoned and the people's ears plugged because they refuse, due to their long history of external abuse, to heed anything contrary to their particular (and current) gospel.
I will not be jumping into every protest, participating in every march, signing every petition, or seeking rank in every boycott. It does not serve me to continue to look for offenses where there are none. I am a true believer that you will find anything you are actively and deliberately looking for. It does not serve me as a citizen of this country or a human on this planet to fight for others' silence when, for centuries, I had ancestors in both the black and gay movements that were forced to be silent themselves. I will not be in every parade - mostly due to the charade and circus atmosphere many have devolved into. (I'm not a huge fan of fairs or circuses!)
I reserve the right to act according to my own interest and I have the right to act upon my own mind in accordance to what I think will be most beneficial. If members of the LGBTQI community want to fight for rights, then it best behooves us to consider the ramifications of those rights once received. I live everyday in a post-civil rights era and I can attest to the fact that it is NOT always a walk in the park!
Rights given do not correlate to skills or tools of utilization.
In the End...
There have been other arguments as to why to or not to see "Ender's Game." I will not be in the ranks of those seeking retribution (or as one author said, "punishment") for someone else's opinions, even if they are starkly contrary to my own. I must also gauge carefully the consequences of my action in the larger scheme of events. I do not find my action to see this movie as detrimental to mine or anyone else's livelihood or well-being nor to the demise of any particular movement I deem necessary fighting for. Everyone must gauge for themselves what their limits and tolerances are. As for me, however, this is not a fight worth engaging in.
And, as in the spirit of the movie, strategy is key!